10 Common Mistakes to Avoid During Divorce

by | May 15, 2024 | Divorce

Divorce is a complex and emotionally challenging process. It’s easy to make mistakes that can have significant consequences for your future. To help you navigate this difficult time, we’ve compiled a list of 10 common mistakes to avoid during divorce. Whether you’re just beginning the process or are already knee-deep in negotiations, being aware of these pitfalls can help you make more informed decisions and protect your interests.

10 Common Mistakes to Avoid During Divorce

  1. Neglecting to Understand Your Finances: One of the most critical aspects of divorce is dividing assets and debts. Failing to fully understand your financial situation can leave you at a significant disadvantage. Take the time to gather all relevant financial documents and consider consulting with a financial advisor to ensure you have a clear picture of your financial standing.
  2. Letting Emotions Dictate Decisions: Divorce is an emotional rollercoaster, and it’s natural to feel angry, hurt, or resentful. However, letting these emotions dictate your decisions can lead to impulsive choices that may not be in your best interests. Try to approach negotiations with a level head and focus on finding practical solutions rather than seeking revenge.
  3. Not Prioritizing Your Children’s Needs: If you have children, their well-being should be your top priority during divorce proceedings. Avoid using them as pawns in negotiations or badmouthing your ex-spouse in front of them. Instead, work together to create a co-parenting plan that prioritizes their needs and minimizes disruption to their lives.
  4. Failing to Communicate Effectively: Effective communication is key to reaching a fair and amicable divorce settlement. Keep the lines of communication open with your ex-spouse, and consider using a mediator or collaborative divorce process to facilitate productive discussions.
  5. Hiding Assets: Attempting to hide assets during divorce proceedings is not only unethical but can also have serious legal consequences. Full financial disclosure is required during divorce, and any attempt to conceal assets can result in penalties and undermine your credibility with the court.
  6. Ignoring Legal Advice: Divorce laws vary by state and can be highly complex. Ignoring the advice of legal professionals or attempting to navigate the process alone can leave you vulnerable to costly mistakes. Seek guidance from an experienced family law attorney who can advocate for your rights and ensure your interests are protected.
  7. Agreeing to Unfair Terms out of Guilt or Pressure: It’s common for one party to feel guilty or pressured into agreeing to terms that are not in their best interests. Take the time to fully understand the implications of any proposed settlement and don’t be afraid to push back or negotiate for more favorable terms.
  8. Failing to Update Legal Documents: Divorce can have wide-ranging implications for your estate plan, will, and other legal documents. Failing to update these documents after divorce can result in unintended consequences, such as leaving assets to an ex-spouse or neglecting to designate a new guardian for your children. Review and update your legal documents promptly to reflect your new circumstances.
  9. Rushing the Process: Divorce is not something to be rushed. Take the time to carefully consider your options and make informed decisions that align with your long-term goals. Rushing the process can lead to oversights or regrets down the line.
  10. Not Seeking Support: Divorce can be isolating, but you don’t have to go through it alone. Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist who can offer emotional support and practical advice. Surrounding yourself with a strong support network can make all the difference during this challenging time.

The Divorce Process

The divorce process can vary depending on the circumstances of each case, but generally follows a similar trajectory. It typically begins with one spouse filing a petition for divorce, which outlines the grounds for divorce and any requests for issues such as child custody, support, and property division. The other spouse is then served with the petition and has the opportunity to respond.

Once both parties have officially initiated the divorce process, they will enter into a period of negotiation and discovery. This involves gathering information about assets, debts, and other relevant factors that will need to be addressed in the divorce settlement. Negotiations may take place directly between the spouses, with the assistance of attorneys, or through alternative dispute resolution methods such as mediation or collaborative divorce.

If the spouses are unable to reach a mutually agreeable settlement, the case may proceed to trial, where a judge will make decisions on contested issues. This can be a lengthy and costly process, so it’s often in the best interests of both parties to try to resolve matters outside of court if possible.

Once a settlement is reached or decisions are made by the court, a judgment of divorce is issued, formally ending the marriage. This judgment will outline the terms of the divorce, including arrangements for child custody and support, spousal support, and the division of assets and debts.

The Importance of Hiring an Attorney

Navigating the divorce process can be overwhelming, especially when emotions are running high. While it may be tempting to try to handle the process on your own, hiring an experienced family law attorney can offer numerous benefits.

First and foremost, an attorney can provide invaluable legal guidance and expertise. Family law is complex, and having someone who understands the intricacies of the legal system can help ensure that your rights are protected and that you receive a fair settlement. An attorney can also help you understand your options and make informed decisions about issues such as child custody, support, and property division.

Additionally, an attorney can serve as a neutral third party in negotiations, helping to facilitate productive discussions and advocate for your interests. This can be particularly helpful when emotions are running high and communication between spouses is difficult.

Perhaps most importantly, hiring an attorney can help alleviate some of the stress and uncertainty associated with the divorce process. Knowing that you have a knowledgeable advocate on your side can provide peace of mind and allow you to focus on moving forward with your life.

We Can Help

At Whipple Mercado and Associates, we understand the complexities of divorce and are here to help you navigate the process with compassion and expertise. Our experienced family law attorneys will work tirelessly to protect your interests and achieve the best possible outcome for your case. Don’t let common mistakes derail your divorce proceedings – contact us today to schedule a consultation and take the first step towards a brighter future.

Tammy J. Mercado

Tammy J. Mercado has a passion for helping her clients achieve their desired results. She listens and she personally and promptly responds to your texts, emails and phone calls. She offers real solutions to your legal matters. Tammy will carefully evaluate the legal issues in your case, provide you with sound advice and offer you the pros and cons of each possible scenario so you can meet your legal objectives. She encourages clients to participate in their own matters. Tammy believes that client participation is key to a positive result and to keeping attorney fees as low as possible. You can be sure that she will offer you straightforward, sound and honest advice in a professional manner, with integrity and excellence.

Before opening her own law practice, Tammy worked for many high-volume law firms. This gave her extensive, diversified experience in hundreds of complex family law cases as well as civil matters. She is admitted to practice law before all courts in California and the United States District Court for the Northern District of California. She is also a member of the American Bar Association, the Contra Costa Bar Association, the Alameda County Bar Association and the Bar Association of San Francisco. Tammy is also a member of the Rotary Club of Danville.

Tammy is a graduate of John F. Kennedy School of Law and holds a Bachelor of Science in business management from the University of Phoenix. Tammy is also a licensed real estate broker, which comes in handy for valuing property in family law cases as well as real estate matters in the civil arena.

During her off time, Tammy is an avid sailor who crews and races on various boats in the San Francisco Bay. Tammy approaches each case as she would any yacht race: by assessing the other’s strengths, weaknesses, experience, equipment, history and reputation. She is a member of the American Sailing Association, and she is a certified Coast Guard Auxiliary member.

HONORS AND AWARDS
Tammy was selected to receive the prestigious “Business Person of the Year” Award in 2017 for the San Ramon Chamber of Commerce.

Tammy is currently serving as Danville Rotary President for 2017 through 2019.

Mary C. Whipple, CFLS

Mary C. Whipple opened her first law practice in the summer of 2008. She previously was an associate attorney at the Law Office of Cummins & Holmes, a full-service civil litigation law firm in San Ramon. The majority of her experience is in family law, which includes divorce, custody, support, prenuptial agreements and domestic-violence restraining orders. Certified by the California State Bar’s Board of Legal Specialization, she is a specialist in the area of family law. Mary has also represented clients in a variety of non-family-law cases, including juvenile dependency, probate, breach of contract and employment disputes, to name a few.

Mary also previously worked as a contract attorney for O’Melveny & Meyers in San Francisco while simultaneously volunteering at the Bar Association of San Francisco’s Volunteer Legal Services Program, representing defendants in unlawful detainer actions. The program acknowledged Mary with an Outstanding Volunteer in Public Service Award in 2006 for her efforts in providing access to justice.

A seventh-generation Californian, Mary is a graduate of Loyola University Chicago School of Law. She earned her Bachelor of Science in criminology at Southern Oregon University in Ashland, Oregon. She is a member of the State Bar of California, the Alameda County Bar Association, and the Contra Costa County Bar Association.

In addition, Mary is active in her community as a member of the Ambassador’s Committee for the San Ramon Chamber of Commerce; a volunteer at the Contra Costa County and Alameda County Superior Courts, where she assists self-represented litigants in completing their divorces; and a member of Divorce Angel, where she provides information regarding family law matters to members of the community. Since 2007 she has been a volunteer judge for Alameda and Contra Costa County’s Annual High School Moot Court Competition. She is also a member of the Danville/Sycamore Valley Rotary Club. She was awarded the San Ramon Chamber of Commerce 2012 Business Person of the Year; and a graduate of the 2012 class of Leadership San Ramon Valley.

CERTIFIED LEGAL SPECIALTIES
Certified Specialist in Family Law by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization