Custody Over the Holidays

by | Nov 10, 2019 | Custody

Holidays can be a difficult time for families after separation or divorce. Special traditions your family enjoyed for years may suddenly change. In particular, agreeing on how to divide child custody over the holidays is often a source of conflict between parents. Unfortunately, there’s probably no simple solution that will seem fair to everyone, but there are some common custody arrangements to consider.

First Steps

The first step is to define which holidays and special occasions will be included in the schedule. Don’t forget to add birthdays, school breaks, and federally recognized dates, like Independence Day. From there you can customize a custody arrangement. You may also wish to clarify the start and end times for these days. The more specific the terms of your agreement are now, the less likely there will be resentment or misunderstandings in the future. Additionally, it’s a good idea to put everything in writing, so there’s a document to refer to if disagreements arise. Here are three options for custody over the holidays.

Split Holidays

When parents live nearby it’s possible to share important days, so children spend time with each parent. You may choose to either split the day, or one parent might have the children Christmas Eve, while the other sees them on Christmas Day.  

Alternating Holidays

One of the more common ways to split custody during the holidays is to alternate every other year. So, if a parent has the children for Easter and Christmas one year, the following year they might have them on Thanksgiving and New Year’s. The details can be negotiated.

Fixed Holidays

Fixed holidays are convenient for parents who value different occasions. For example, Mother’s Day, and Father’s Day. Or, if a couple had an interfaith marriage, it might be easier for them to permanently divvy up religious celebrations.  

Double Holidays

There are times when it might make the most sense to celebrate a holiday twice, regardless of how the calendar dates line up. For instance, a child can have a birthday party with each parent, even if it’s not until the next scheduled visit.

Once you agree on a broad outline for custody over the holidays, stipulations can be added to address minor details, such as who will drop off and pick up the children. Try to anticipate what might become an issue, so it can be ironed out now. Everyone will be happier if there’s a clear schedule to follow, and the holidays can be enjoyed without conflict. This might also be a time to consider some new traditions with your children.

Should you have questions about your visitation or custody issues, schedule a free consultation with one of our family law attorneys at Whipple, Mercado & Associates.

Tammy J. Mercado

Tammy J. Mercado has a passion for helping her clients achieve their desired results. She listens and she personally and promptly responds to your texts, emails and phone calls. She offers real solutions to your legal matters. Tammy will carefully evaluate the legal issues in your case, provide you with sound advice and offer you the pros and cons of each possible scenario so you can meet your legal objectives. She encourages clients to participate in their own matters. Tammy believes that client participation is key to a positive result and to keeping attorney fees as low as possible. You can be sure that she will offer you straightforward, sound and honest advice in a professional manner, with integrity and excellence.

Before opening her own law practice, Tammy worked for many high-volume law firms. This gave her extensive, diversified experience in hundreds of complex family law cases as well as civil matters. She is admitted to practice law before all courts in California and the United States District Court for the Northern District of California. She is also a member of the American Bar Association, the Contra Costa Bar Association, the Alameda County Bar Association and the Bar Association of San Francisco. Tammy is also a member of the Rotary Club of Danville.

Tammy is a graduate of John F. Kennedy School of Law and holds a Bachelor of Science in business management from the University of Phoenix. Tammy is also a licensed real estate broker, which comes in handy for valuing property in family law cases as well as real estate matters in the civil arena.

During her off time, Tammy is an avid sailor who crews and races on various boats in the San Francisco Bay. Tammy approaches each case as she would any yacht race: by assessing the other’s strengths, weaknesses, experience, equipment, history and reputation. She is a member of the American Sailing Association, and she is a certified Coast Guard Auxiliary member.

HONORS AND AWARDS
Tammy was selected to receive the prestigious “Business Person of the Year” Award in 2017 for the San Ramon Chamber of Commerce.

Tammy is currently serving as Danville Rotary President for 2017 through 2019.

Mary C. Whipple, CFLS

Mary C. Whipple opened her first law practice in the summer of 2008. She previously was an associate attorney at the Law Office of Cummins & Holmes, a full-service civil litigation law firm in San Ramon. The majority of her experience is in family law, which includes divorce, custody, support, prenuptial agreements and domestic-violence restraining orders. Certified by the California State Bar’s Board of Legal Specialization, she is a specialist in the area of family law. Mary has also represented clients in a variety of non-family-law cases, including juvenile dependency, probate, breach of contract and employment disputes, to name a few.

Mary also previously worked as a contract attorney for O’Melveny & Meyers in San Francisco while simultaneously volunteering at the Bar Association of San Francisco’s Volunteer Legal Services Program, representing defendants in unlawful detainer actions. The program acknowledged Mary with an Outstanding Volunteer in Public Service Award in 2006 for her efforts in providing access to justice.

A seventh-generation Californian, Mary is a graduate of Loyola University Chicago School of Law. She earned her Bachelor of Science in criminology at Southern Oregon University in Ashland, Oregon. She is a member of the State Bar of California, the Alameda County Bar Association, and the Contra Costa County Bar Association.

In addition, Mary is active in her community as a member of the Ambassador’s Committee for the San Ramon Chamber of Commerce; a volunteer at the Contra Costa County and Alameda County Superior Courts, where she assists self-represented litigants in completing their divorces; and a member of Divorce Angel, where she provides information regarding family law matters to members of the community. Since 2007 she has been a volunteer judge for Alameda and Contra Costa County’s Annual High School Moot Court Competition. She is also a member of the Danville/Sycamore Valley Rotary Club. She was awarded the San Ramon Chamber of Commerce 2012 Business Person of the Year; and a graduate of the 2012 class of Leadership San Ramon Valley.

CERTIFIED LEGAL SPECIALTIES
Certified Specialist in Family Law by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization