9 Signs Your Spouse Might be a Narcissist

by | Aug 20, 2021 | Divorce

The term narcissist is widely deployed as a term for someone who is too full of themselves. You might spot a muscular fellow at the beach who makes sure to catch glimpses of himself any chance he gets in the side view mirror of a car as a classic narcissist, but that actually might not be the case at all. Although it is tempting to blanket this term over anyone in love with their own reflection, a true narcissist has a few distinguishing and specific traits. 

Narcissists are difficult to maintain a meaningful relationship with because they will be front and center to the relationship while their spouse will fall by the wayside. And in fact, family law attorneys see many divorces involving narcissists end up in court. This is because narcissists are notorious for their refusal to compromise or negotiate, have a strong sense of entitlement, and are prone to manipulating those around them. It is important to protect yourself with the best family law attorney to ensure you get a fair divorce. 

Are you searching for the best family law attorney to advocate for you? Read on to learn about classic narcissist signs to look for and how Whipple, Mercado & Associates can help protect you.

Signs of a Narcissist

The American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th Edition (otherwise known as the DSM-V), lists the following as narcissistic traits, and a patient must display at least five of the following behaviors over a period of time to qualify as a narcissist. It is important to note that only a licensed psychiatrist or clinical psychologist can diagnose a person as a true narcissist.

Signs of Narcissistic Behavior:

1.     An inflated sense of self-importance, including entitlement and self-centeredness. They may exaggerate their achievements and talents;

2.     A fixation on fantasies of power, intelligence, success, beauty, or ideal romance;

3.     A belief they’re superior and can only be understood by others who are special;

4.     A need for constant attention and admiration from others, or in other words seek constant stroking of ego and validation;

5.     An unreasonable expectation of favorable treatment they are not entitled to;

6.     Exploitive behavior and take advantage of or step over others to meet their own needs and reach their own goals;

7.     A lack of empathy that inhibits them from recognizing others’ feelings and needs;

8.     An envy of others or a belief that other people envy them;

9.     Grandiosity and show arrogant behaviors or attitudes.

If you decide to divorce your narcissistic spouse, it is important to prepare for the worst. Filing for divorce can be a major blow to your spouse’s self-esteem and calls into question his or her self-worth. In addition, a narcissist will fight and challenge you every step of the way. He or she will not admit fault or failure and will not admit to imperfect behavior. Additionally, a narcissist cannot see anything from anyone else’s point of view because he or she is always right and everyone else is wrong. This can make a divorce an aggravating and draining experience because it feels like no matter what you do, you can never win.

Hire a Family Law Attorney

It’s important to hire the best family law attorney you can find to handle your divorce case if you believe your soon-to-be ex is a narcissist. He or she will strike the moment you let your guard down, so you will need the best professional help to handle your case. Whipple, Mercado & Associates is here for you. You can schedule a free consultation, or give us a call today at (925) 344-5050

References

American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed.).

Tammy J. Mercado

Tammy J. Mercado has a passion for helping her clients achieve their desired results. She listens and she personally and promptly responds to your texts, emails and phone calls. She offers real solutions to your legal matters. Tammy will carefully evaluate the legal issues in your case, provide you with sound advice and offer you the pros and cons of each possible scenario so you can meet your legal objectives. She encourages clients to participate in their own matters. Tammy believes that client participation is key to a positive result and to keeping attorney fees as low as possible. You can be sure that she will offer you straightforward, sound and honest advice in a professional manner, with integrity and excellence.

Before opening her own law practice, Tammy worked for many high-volume law firms. This gave her extensive, diversified experience in hundreds of complex family law cases as well as civil matters. She is admitted to practice law before all courts in California and the United States District Court for the Northern District of California. She is also a member of the American Bar Association, the Contra Costa Bar Association, the Alameda County Bar Association and the Bar Association of San Francisco. Tammy is also a member of the Rotary Club of Danville.

Tammy is a graduate of John F. Kennedy School of Law and holds a Bachelor of Science in business management from the University of Phoenix. Tammy is also a licensed real estate broker, which comes in handy for valuing property in family law cases as well as real estate matters in the civil arena.

During her off time, Tammy is an avid sailor who crews and races on various boats in the San Francisco Bay. Tammy approaches each case as she would any yacht race: by assessing the other’s strengths, weaknesses, experience, equipment, history and reputation. She is a member of the American Sailing Association, and she is a certified Coast Guard Auxiliary member.

HONORS AND AWARDS
Tammy was selected to receive the prestigious “Business Person of the Year” Award in 2017 for the San Ramon Chamber of Commerce.

Tammy is currently serving as Danville Rotary President for 2017 through 2019.

Mary C. Whipple, CFLS

Mary C. Whipple opened her first law practice in the summer of 2008. She previously was an associate attorney at the Law Office of Cummins & Holmes, a full-service civil litigation law firm in San Ramon. The majority of her experience is in family law, which includes divorce, custody, support, prenuptial agreements and domestic-violence restraining orders. Certified by the California State Bar’s Board of Legal Specialization, she is a specialist in the area of family law. Mary has also represented clients in a variety of non-family-law cases, including juvenile dependency, probate, breach of contract and employment disputes, to name a few.

Mary also previously worked as a contract attorney for O’Melveny & Meyers in San Francisco while simultaneously volunteering at the Bar Association of San Francisco’s Volunteer Legal Services Program, representing defendants in unlawful detainer actions. The program acknowledged Mary with an Outstanding Volunteer in Public Service Award in 2006 for her efforts in providing access to justice.

A seventh-generation Californian, Mary is a graduate of Loyola University Chicago School of Law. She earned her Bachelor of Science in criminology at Southern Oregon University in Ashland, Oregon. She is a member of the State Bar of California, the Alameda County Bar Association, and the Contra Costa County Bar Association.

In addition, Mary is active in her community as a member of the Ambassador’s Committee for the San Ramon Chamber of Commerce; a volunteer at the Contra Costa County and Alameda County Superior Courts, where she assists self-represented litigants in completing their divorces; and a member of Divorce Angel, where she provides information regarding family law matters to members of the community. Since 2007 she has been a volunteer judge for Alameda and Contra Costa County’s Annual High School Moot Court Competition. She is also a member of the Danville/Sycamore Valley Rotary Club. She was awarded the San Ramon Chamber of Commerce 2012 Business Person of the Year; and a graduate of the 2012 class of Leadership San Ramon Valley.

CERTIFIED LEGAL SPECIALTIES
Certified Specialist in Family Law by the State Bar of California Board of Legal Specialization